Author's Note:
Hi ! midorinohime here. I wrote chapter 8 and decided to post it here first. It's so short because I want this chapter to show the readers how Dara is coping up with what happened to her. I don't know but when I read the other chapters in seemed like she's taking it easy and slowly trying to brush off the incident. But I know better ('Course I do! I am the author! haha. At least I can pretend that I am omniscient here kkk). The incident is eating her every night, haunting her in her sleep and depraving her of peace. I don't know if I will still add some more but probably not.
Also, in this chapter, I want to show you guys how Jiyong is staring to care for our Dara-chan. Well, maybe I should just add a point of view from Jiyong ( saves the post and runs off to her room to start writing Jiyong's POV).
I decided that I would not post any stories yet on my accounts in FF dot net, winglin, YGL, AF and etc. I wanted to at least write a couple of chapters before posting one so the post would be more frequent.
Okay. I have been blabbering here so I'm going to stop now. haha.
Haven’t Met You Yet
midorinohime
In the Midst of the Dark Night
Chapter 8
Jiyong's POV
"Are you sure you did not forget anything?" Mrs. Park asked.
We were now in the van, headed to Everland in Yongin. The family decided to just stop by the Amusement Park before going to Busan. We're supposed to go to Daegu but Sanghyun and I both wanted to go to Everland. Of course it's still part of the plan for Sandara.
"Neh," Sandara said. She was sitting in between SangHyun and Durami while I sat beside Sanghyun. "Why don't we just head straight to Halmeoni?"
"We just want to have fun, noona." Sanghyun said, trying to look cute.
"Fine."
Sandara had been avoiding my gaze from the moment she woke up. I don't know maybe she still feels so awkward after what happened a few hours ago.
Flashback
My eyes fluttered open. She's crying again. I thought she already fell asleep. Good thing her younger brother already is not here anymore. I continued to listen to her cries and whimpers. Her room is just near where the living room is so I can clearly hear her stiffled cries./Should I go inside?/ I asked myself. But before I even come up with a decision, I find myself walking towards her room, /I guess my already decided for me./
I stopped in front of her door, hesitating if I should go in. She might get angry for I am invading her privacy. /I shouldn't even be listening to her right now. I should not g-/ but I heard her sobbing again, and as if it is the cue my hand was waiting for, it instantly turned the knob and opened the door slightly. /What are you doing Kwon Jiyong?! Are you out of your mind?/ My body was absolutely ignoring my mind's protest.
As I slowly pushed the door ajar, I saw her petite figure, sitting on the corner of her bed, hugging her knees. Her shoulders shaking uncontrollably. I couldn't see her face because her head was bent down, resting it on her folded knees. The scene tugged at my heart, and I unconsciously pushed the door wide open.
"Sandara?" was that my voice? Yeah, it is. It sounded so worried. I saw how her body stiffened hearing my voice. I don't know if I was waiting for her to look up at me or what but when a couple of seconds passed, she still had not look up, I suddenly felt alarmed for she also stopped the small sounds she's making. I entered the room right away.
Maybe she heard my footsteps, maybe she did not. But. Finally. She looked up, her face, wet with tears. At first, her face looked so surprised, but after a second or two, her brows furrowed, as if she's confused. I sat down beside her at the edge of the bed. She bent her head down once more.
"I am sorry. Did I wake you up, Jiyong-ssi?" she asked. She's trying to wipe her tears discreetly. So when she looked up at me once again with a bright smile, I pretended not to know and she it.
"Nope." I answered. "Do you mind if I stay here?" I asked after heaving a deep sigh. / I think I read somewhere that if you sigh, it would somehow release the stress you have in our heart. Maybe I should sigh often. This girl is giving me one million times the amount of stress I feel before stepping on stage on my first ever concert.
She shook her head softly to say her answer. She moved a bit to give me space where I can sit beside her. After a moment of silence, she finally broke it. "Maybe, It's better if you sleep here. It's very uncomfortable to sleep on the couch."
I told her that it's fine with me and flashed her my trademark smile, teh same smile that would usually send my fangirls screaming their lungs out in frenzy. It somehow makes me feel weird to smile and not receive the same reaction from the fangirls. Hah! At least, I do not have to worry about her eating me alive and blasting my eardrums because of her screaming. /Man. What are you thinking? She does not even know that you are famous. Well, Yeah. I am not yet famous in this year but still I will be famous a few year later./
I moved my gaze towards the open window but as I did, my eyes caught a glimpse of their family picture. "Is this your dad?" I asked, grabbing the frame while my eyes are glued to the man hugging her and Sanghyun. /Jeez. What kind of question is that? Of course he's their father./ I mentally scolded myself.
She murmured a small yes.
"How come he did not come here with you and your family?"
"HE has another family now."
"Oh." /great Jiyong. Just great. Now stop asking questions before you make her cry again/ "I am sorry."
"It's okay. He and Umma separated back when we were still young. /So their mom and Dad got divorced... It must have been very difficult for them to grow without a father figure and for Auntie to raise them all alone. Good thing, Sandara's popular in the Philippines now. She can help her mother with their expenses.
I glanced at the silent girl beside me and noticed that her eyes started to water, purposely biting her lower lip to prevent it from falling. /Now, look what you have done. You triggered her memory of her father. Now she's hurting again and trying to conceal her tears from you./
I had the sudden urge to comfort her. I don't know why I am feeling this way but it feels like this is what I have to do and want to do. To be here with her and be her strength. Like my purpose is to be here with her. Right now. Right here. The that thought struck me. /Am I here because I am fated to be with her?/ I put down teh frame to the bedside table.
"You don't have to keep it all in." She's trying to fight back the tears. I can see how much she's struggling. It stunned me how this fragile looking girl beside me makes my heart wrench by just the sight of her right now. I don't know but my body acted again without my permission and hugged her. It does not matter anymore for it feels like it felt so right.
"Don't do this to yourself, Sandara... I am here. You can lean on me..." After a moment, I felt her bury her face on my chest and cry her heart out. I felt her pain, her suffering, her fears... I felt how broken she is right now. I don't know how. Don't ask me. All this things happening right now is just as mysterious to me as it is to everyone else. I didn't ask anyone to bring me back to this year. To meet this broken angel crying silently. But it somehow made me glad that I am here. To be with her. To be able to help her. To somehow make her happy. To erase all her fears...
"I am so scared. Jiyong-sshi," she cried, feeling her mangled heart. It has been a very long and tedious journey, Sandara Park. You don't have to worry anymore. I will stay. Here and now, to protect you and to drive all your fears and hurt away. I will stay to make sure you feel all the happiness you deserve,
This feeling is so foreign to me. These thoughts in my mind, the sudden will to shield her from all things that pain her. it's an alien emotion to me. I told you that I have been with several girls before, including Chloe, but this feeling, the feeling Sandara Park is igniting within me, is new, perfectly new to me.
Whatever it is, as long as it feels right, it does not matter. I gently rubbed back while she's crying like a helpless babe. "I know... I know..." /I know how scared you are, I am here, you have nothing to fear/ I lightly planted a soft kiss on her hair.
She might have been surprised for she suddenly stopped crying and stiffened. "Sandara?" she still did not respond. I peered down at her and caressed her face. Did she stop breathing?!/I tilted her chin up for her to face me. I am right. She's surprised because of the gesture I made. Her brown eyes, still glassy because of tears, are wide and astonished. I can't help but be lost in those deep brown eyes. Her eyes fluttered a bit and broke her eye contact with me to slowly look down. I did not realize that I am already starting to lean closer to her. My lips just a breath away from her and my heart beating like there's no tomorrow. My eyes found hers once again while my hand still lingers on her chin. Slowly, slowly, her eyes began to close as my lips lightly brushed against her soft pink one.
/What are you doing Kwon Jiyong?!/ My mind screamed at me. I pulled away and hesitated but her eyes are still closed and her lips slightly parted, seducing me to once again feel it's sweetness. /Who cares what minds say?!/ So I chose to ignore it.
End of Flash back
Remebering the shared kiss brings a smile on my face.
"Yah! Ji-hyung. Are you off your rocker again? You are smiling like a mad man again."
I just smiled at him again, as my eyes caught someone else’s pair of eyes. She looked away immediately and saw her cheeks tainted with a light pink blush. / I guess I am not the only one who's remembering the events a few hours ago.../ I thought as I ruffled her brother's hair.
Dara's POV
/ Oh my God. Is he thinking of it?! kyah!!!/ I can still vividly picture what happened this morning, and remembering it makes my cheeks feel warm. I know I am blushing who wouldn't be?!
Flashback
I tried to push away the images in my mind. But it just kept on coming back, haunting me every minute of every day, I recounted the day’s event, Jiyong and my family enjoying each other’s company. I tried to use it to lead my thoughts astray and forget the images, those disgusting and horrible images that had been pestering me in my sleep and in my waking hours. It’s been two days already since it happened. I don’t want my family to be worried so I kept it to myself.
Tears began to flow freely down my cheeks, as I bit my lower lip so as not to make any sound that would wake the other inhabitants of the house. They’d hear me if I won’t do it. I felt my whole body shaking uncontrollably so I forced myself to sit up and hug my knees, trembling and shivering, and buried my face.
I was scared, even now hat I am already in the safe confinement of my house and protective presence of my family, I still feel the same. I want to forget it. To make this feeling go. What should I do? What should I do to forget it? Who should I ask to help me push it away from my mind? Tell me… please…. I looked out of the window at the left side of my bed.
If it was any other day, I would’ve enjoyed the scenery, the beautiful night sky, with all those pretty stars and majestic moon. But because of what happened, I always dreaded the night time. Being alone means reliving the terrifying event once again.
I hugged myself tighter as if it would chase the bleak pain I am feeling. I continued whimpering, my shoulders moving up and down as I cry my heart out.
“Sandara?” I heard someone call my name. I looked up and saw Jiyong standing by the doorway looking worried. He walked towards me and sat down beside me. I bent my head down to prevent him from seeing how pathetic I look with this wet tears trailing down my cheeks. After a moment I mustered some courage to finally look up and gave him my most warm smile. I thought I was crying silently. Did he hear me?
“I am sorry… Did I wake you up, Jiyong-sshi?” I asked, wiping my tears away in the process. I am glad that he is not looking at me. Let’s just pretend that I was not crying, ne?
He sighed. “Do you mind if I stay here?”
I shook my head lightly. “No. It’s okay.” I moved a little bit to give him some room. “Maybe, you should sleep here instead. It’s quite uncomfortable to sleep on the couch.” I suggested. “Don’t worry; I’ll sleep at Durami’s room.” I added.
“Nah. It’s fine with me,” he said giving me his lopsided smile. Then he saw our family picture on the bedside table. “Is this your dad?”
“Neh.”
“How come he didn’t accompany you and your family here in visiting your grandma?” he asked his eyes still on the picture.
“He already has another family,” I said quietly.
“Oh,” he put the frame back on the table and murmured an apology.
“It’s okay He and my mom separated when we were still young.” He didn’t say anything. We just sat in silence for I don’t know how long. I don’t know, but Jiyong being here beside me calms and soothes me, come to think of it; I even forgot the horrible things that happened two days ago. My eyes started to tear up again as the thought entered my mind. I forced myself not to cry. At least not now, not when Jiyong’s here. Not when my family is just next door. Don’t please. Don’t break down now…
“You don’t have to keep it to yourself, Sandara. You have to release all of it. It’s the first step.” I unconsciously bit my lip, trying to stop myself from crying. My head bent down once again, my eyes wide, as if making it that way would stop the stupid tears from falling. I thought I’m already winning the battle against my tears but Jiyong suddenly pulled me in his embrace.
“Don’t do this to yourself… I am here… You can lean on me.” And just that. All the courageous fight with my tears and inner self crumbled. Next thing I knew, I am already pouring all the tears, fears, pain I had been keeping inside for two long days. I buried my face to his chest. It muffled my cries so I am not that worried my family would hear me.
“I am so scared, Jiyong-sshi,” I said in between helpless sobs. I don’t care anymore if I am wetting his shirt with my tears full of anguish. I do not care if he’s seeing how vulnerable I am inside.
“I know… I know…” he held me tighter and felt him rubbing my back gently, comfortingly, as he planted a light kiss on my hair.
I felt my body stiffened. /Did he just kissed my hair?/ I don't know how long I am pondering about his actions but then I felt his hands caressed my face. "Sandara?" he asked. /Omo! What should I do?!/ His hands stopped caressing my face and slowly tilted my chin to look at me. His eyes, so expressive, yet looked so worried. /Is he worried about me?/ I asked myself as my eyes widened at that thought. I avoided looking at his eyes. Not a good move though for my eyes caught sight of his lips. I felt my self gulp. /Look somewhere else Sandy!/ my mind said. But then, I find myself staring back at those eyes... /wait... Is it just me or his face is getting closer?... Was he going to... Omo!/ I tried to force myself to move away from him but his eyes, looking at me so seductively, making mine's droop slowly... I felt his breath on my lips before his lips lightly brushed mine. My heart is thumping frantically. /Am I having a heart attack?!/ I didn't realize that he already pulled away from that kiss. My eyes are still closed and I can still feel the warmth his lips has given me. My lips unconsciously parted and before I knew it, he's kissing me again but not the same as the first one... And what surprised me the most is that... I am kissing him back...
End of flashback
"Unnie? Are you okay?" Durami asked. "You're face is so red!" she exclaimed. /Oh Durami! Don't please. Don't broadcast it!/
"It's nothing... It's just so hot..." I said, using my hand as a fan.
"It is? But..."
"Shut up," I muttered under my breath. I heard someone chuckled. "What?!"
"Nothing..." Jiyong said, smiling, and looked out the window.
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